Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Provision

Once again, I write a LONG overdue post. I wish I had more time to write, and I wish I wanted to spend the time I do have updating the blog. Because Jeff and I both feel strongly that it's important to update those of you who have faithfully supported us in prayer during this journey. We would not have survived to this point without those prayers. So, here goes...

Now almost three weeks home with our little guy, we have gotten a lot of things down. We feel really comfortable with all his meds and with the feedings (pump, formula, etc.), so that is great. We are so thankful to have been able to borrow and find several things - stroller, nap nanny, bath seat, bean bag - to make transporting and positioning him easier and to help give him a change of scenery from the bed in his room. We met our wonderful Sooner Start therapist last week, and she is working on getting him a special needs stroller, a bath seat and even a piece of standing equipment so he can be upright some of the time. So some more specialized equipment will be a huge blessing!

Some of the not-so-great parts are that Logan is very sleepy most of the time. He just doesn't have energy to do much of anything, and that is pretty heartbreaking. He has had some digestion complications that have caused some discomfort and fussy nights, and the poor thing can be pretty difficult to console when he's fussy. As parents, the hardest part is seeing him uncomfortable and unhappy and not being able to do a thing about it. We struggled for a few days with a little day-night mixup, where he was really restless most evenings from 9 or 10 until sometimes 2 or 3 am, so naturally he was making up for it by sleeping a lot during the day. For the last couple days, we have seen very little awake time from him. He seems to be working really hard to breathe, so we're just praying that he is not in any pain or discomfort and doing our best to spend time with him while making sure our other little guy is taken care of.

Griffin is still doing really well at Mother's Day Out. His teachers love him and it seems the feeling is mutual. I am SO glad about this. He has developed a new favorite word, "no," so that is lots of fun for mom and dad! On the other hand, he is still his precious, sweet self a lot of the time. He loves his cuddle time with mom & dad, and has had some really tender moments with his brother - bringing us to tears on more than one occasion. What a little blessing he is!

Last, but most certainly not least, we have been trying to figure out what to say in response to the overwhelming amount of physical support we have received. The emotional and spiritual support - as I said before - has sustained us. But we haven't talked about the financial support you all have provided, and I guess that's because we have yet to be 100% comfortable with receiving it. I'd like to think that we are not proud people, but we are pretty independent, I-can-do-it-on-my-own type people. I'm sure you can imagine how humbling it can be to accept this kind of help, and from many people we don't even know. Nevertheless, we are so, so grateful. People have done countless things for us, and continue to do so - set up a bank account, meal calendar, donated money, brought food, mowed our lawn, done yard work, provided a house cleaner - the list goes on and on. And now, there is a tremendous amount of time and energy being invested in a golf tournament / dinner / auction event that sounds like it is going to be an absolutely amazing event! We are so honored that so many people are selflessly devoting their most precious resources to put this on. We have been able to remain pretty hands-off (by our choice) and we trust that those working on the event are doing so with the same intentions we have.

Our main purpose for sharing our story so candidly has been to give the glory where it belongs - to God. He has been our comfort, our strength, our peace and our provider. A while back, when we were having concerns about bringing Logan home and all the logistics that would entail, the following verse was part of my quiet time...

“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?
“And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?
“So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.
“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today." (Matthew 6:25-34 NLT)

God was clearly telling me that He's got this. There is nothing we will need that He can't provide. Though we may feel a little strange about accepting financial help, God is working through the amazing community around us to provide in this way as well. He is so good!

I am hoping to have some more links up on the sidebars so you all can follow along on Facebook and with the benefit event. We are so blessed and so thankful.